Living life on the borderline

The F word.

Posted on: April 4, 2010

This post discusses weight gain, food and food lists.. As a forewarning.

F word means Food.

Fat.

Failure.

I’m not even going to put down what I weigh now. It is a ridiculous amount in the space of 6 weeks though. Verging on dangerous. All down to these stupid stupid stupid antidepressants that aren’t even working! I’m tempted to just stop taking them, but that would be hard seeing as Mum gives me my meds.  I would take them myself but the tablets are in a locked box, due to the obsessions I get about overdosing.

I’ve had a slice of toast with peanut butter and jam today. And that’s it. I’m living off apple juice, fruit tea and water. Yeah, I make myself sick at times and yeah, I was underweight at one point but I don’t understand why the hospital threatened me with the eating disorder unit. I’m in the “danger of being overweight” BMI category, for the love of God. In the space of 6 weeks. I do NOT have an eating disorder. Idiots. I can’t actually think of anything but this at the moment.

*bubbles forth with profanity*

Mmm. Cranberry, raspberry and elderflower tea..

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About the blogger.

I'm an 18 year old girl/woman/person of the female gender who blogs about growing up, living with mental health problems and her experience with the NHS mental health services, both CAMHS and CMHTs. Expect plenty of teenage angst and general craziness. Nothing out of the ordinary here.

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